I recently had the honor and privilege of interviewing my jerk face friend, Mick Zano. We met over a beer in downtown Flagstaff to discuss fake news, satire, and what Zano calls the State of the Onion. We had our fair share of battles in the lead up to the election, as he was a little more Bernie and I was totally with her. Post the election, we both fear for our country’s future at the hands of this mad man. Though it pains me to admit it, the Zanster has made some good points over the beers. Whether you call it fake, satire, spoof, or per the website ‘pseudo journalistic’, the Discord continues to be a fun and informative read. But he’s still a jerk face and he made me say that under duress!
The rightwing aversion to truth is worsening and it’s spreading like a T-Virus at a Trump rally. Resident Drivel? The Foxeteers continue to shun the implications of any data, studies, or facts that contradict their ailing ideology. Valid data is fake science and valid points are fake news. Whereas conspiracy theories are abound on the left as well, liberal angst is still generally grounded in pacifism, intellectualism, sustainability and survival (PISS).
What exactly is Trump Derangement Syndrome? Offhand the words ‘Trump’ and ‘Derangement’ seem like a harmonious linguistic pairing, but the addition of the word ‘syndrome’ implies those concerned about Trump’s derangement are themselves deranged. Many theories are abound and, as usual, you can click and drag the republican version of events over to the nearest receptacle icon. Ctrl-Alt-Elite? As a blogger who predicted disaster at this historical juncture, I have a theory of my own. In 2017 if you are comfortable with the state of our union, you are the problem. See? That wasn’t so hard. You can call me the father of TDS as I planned to lose my shit no matter who on the right got the presidential nod. I’ve been organizing this whole Resist-type effort for well over a decade, and I expect to see all 11 members of the Zano Nation at my rally next Friday over at Hops on Birch. BYOB. You will have to smuggle it in as Hops is a bar.
As Trump flares and burns across the night sky like a shooting star with too much beta-carotene, Fox News recently tweeted this gem. Last week, instead of covering the news, they got tens of thousands of people to retweet something that should be an embarrassment to their brand. Granted, finding Republican accomplishments is fast becoming Bigfoot rare, but this is absurd even by Fox News ‘standards’. Look at that above image again …take as long as you need. Sure Bush and Trump inherited strong economies—operative word ‘inherited’. Simply put, history will grade Obama and Clinton’s economic prowess and accomplishments light-years ahead of Dubya and Trump’s. So you can shove the rest of your 24/7 anecdotal drivel up Hannity’s America (Mick drop).
Apparently the term ‘Deplorables’ is not wildly popular amongst those deplorable people among us, so how about the ‘Unreachables’ or the ‘Irredeemables’? Or maybe we should channel some Vizzini and go with the ‘Inconceivables’? Our president enjoys historically bad early approval ratings and he’s flip flopped on almost every major campaign promise, yet only an astounding 2% of Trump supporters show any buyer’s remorse whatsoever. It reminds me of when Dubya left office, still holding a 70% approval rating in Kansas. Bad Economies Matter? Today our economic growth is slowing, our healthcare system is exploding, and WWIII is looming large (all way ahead of Trump’s golf schedule). Keep your guns, peeps, but you may not be able to afford the bullets soon. Silencer of the Lames?
Are we moving toward fascism? My designated term of endearment for our president, Ass-Clown Hitler, was chosen for a reason as the only thing standing between our nation and some extra-strength Nazinol is Trump’s three-ring stupidity. What many of us despise about Trump, his terminal buffoonery, may actually be our saving grace. There’s certainly a down side to having an ass-clown leading the free world, but what if he were Dick Cheney? Cheney was smart and evil, which is a much more potent force. Come on, Dick, if the jackboot fits… Granted, conservatives are generally not the sharpest political tools in the shed, but if we keep re-electing them one of these days they’re going to get it alt-right.
In his book, “The Origin of Consciousness”, the late author Julian Jaynes detailed a compelling case for how and why leadership became the driving force in the development of civilization. Our governments, institutions, clergy, and corporations demonstrate and depend on Jaynes’ basic premise that, in essence, “top-down organizational charts” direct the masses toward behaviors and thinking consistent with the advancement and security of humanity. Under n…ormal circumstances, history shows that those who have become good leaders have been bestowed with the intelligence and insight necessary to advance the condition of those who depend on their judgment. Do you see where I’m going with this?
Zano’s recent reflections on our decade-plus debate showed some rare insights. What next, funny jokes? The causes of our nation’s polarization are many, but there’s more than meets the eye when it comes to our political divisions. I’ve recently come to the conclusion the ultra-powerful people in the world do prosper by keeping our nation divided. They do this by keeping us all focused on superficial controversies meant as a distraction from the deeper, more ominous issues threatening our sovereignty. I’ve come to believe there are international bankers who have infiltrated, compromised, and ultimately control both parties as well as every corner of the political landscape. Yes, I’m going to go a tad Rothschild/Illuminati here. Not too much, though, just a teaspoon PRN. But isn’t this the lesson from the 2004 presidential campaign? If you recall both John Kerry (D) and George W. Bush (R) had both been bum-fuck initiated into the same secret society, Skull and Bones, at Yale University. Doesn’t Skull and Bones imply piracy? Maybe there isn’t so much separating Democrats v Republicans, but the fallout does allow these international pirates to claim their booty and threaten our national sovereignty. Please don’t add a booty joke, Zano …I’m asking nicely.
Debating the merits of the Republican party is futile, because they don’t have any. Endlessly conveying to my blogvesary how discourse is dead has become Ray-Charles-at-a-shooting-range aimless. Polarization has led us to this place of irreconcilable political differences. To his credit, Pokey saw this coming too. Whereas he blames liberalism for creating an immoral societal malaise, I place the sad state of our union squarely at the doorstep of the GOP …hold the malaise? As for the media, my fear has always been that MSNBC would follow the money and become an alternate ideological echo-chamber. Fox left? This would then cause the impermeable GOP-bubble to spread libward. Whereas this is happening, my rebuttal to the Pokester remains: if your endgame was to elect a sociopathic ass-clown to the Oval Office, no one should care to review the particulars on how you reached that sad, royal turd of a conclusion. Crowning bereavement?
Back around 1840, Horace Greely encouraged pioneers to “go west, young man” with decidedly mixed results. He likely made this proclamation safely from a Greenwich Village pub. In that spirit of spirits, on this the first day of the week, aka Mojito Monday, I’m encouraging a shift progressiveward. Half measures will no longer suffice (see: Obamacare, or Hillary Campaign). Go big, or go Rome. We must run on a more progressive platform. Republicans keep doubling down on their wrongness, so why not double down on our rightness? Novel idea, eh? If you follow political trends, our nation tends to muddle through under liberal-centrists, but struggles mightily under more conservative leadership. So let’s do something completely different! Let’s break away from the indifferent model. We’ve thoroughly vetted the pragmatic political passivity approach, which, like that depressed body builder, stopped working out. Apapathetic?