Features

Political features and current events

Study Finds Debating Table Lamp More Engaging Than Average Republican


Critical thinking on the right side of the political spectrum is officially dead. Elvis has left the Trump rally. The reactionary factless responses that define today’s political landscape now permeate every corner of the Twiright Zone. Thankfully, real evidence of the problem is surfacing, as a recent Oxford study supports my shift from a ‘Deplorable’ designation to an ‘Unreachable’ one. Facts can no longer penetrate the Trump supporters’ noggins, period. Neuropolitical studies continue to support my rather harsh assessment of our conservative friends’ adverse relationship to the truth. Of course, they would reply, Fake Science! According to this Fake Study, Trump supporters pass around more nonsense, or Foxal Matter, on social media platforms than any other group on the planet. As a result, our staunch evangelical friends can now only engage in debates with themselves. Mass debaters? Yep, its Oxford University vs the Glenn Beck Chalk-Sniffing Choir. Good luck with that.

Fox News Explains Recent Stock Market Slump: Now Available In Coloring Book And Scratch-N-Sniff

Dimension F—Sean Hannity of Fox News infamy was quick to blame the stock market’s recent 1600 point plunge on Donald Trump’s predecessor. For those Foxeteers among us, that means the black guy. Hannity then proceeded to go on a lengthy rant about Obama’s terribly weak, no good economy, when he was actually referring to Obama’s predecessor. For those Foxeteers among us, that means Incurious George (oh, and you can look up “incurious”, but by definition you probably won’t). Hannity finished his latest insightful segment with a special comment on how #Bear Markets Matter, which, as it turns out, is also bull.

The Kristol Ship: Can’t The GOP Just Get Back To Unnecessary Wars And Tanking The Economy?

Regardless of one’s political affiliation, it’s hard to dislike William Kristol of Weekly Standard fame. He, if nothing else, represents a rare voice of reason for the conservative movement. He’s always proven wrong, but he’s at least a seemingly informed know-nothing. Not surprising, Kristol is showing some buyer’s remorse amidst the new political wasteland that he and his ilk helped foment. In a recent article, he said, “Disenthrallment is not disdain. Thinking anew does not mean thinking as a progressive.” This can be roughly translated as, “With a Republican super-majority, thus in our darkest hour, we must resist the urge to turn toward anything remotely sensible.” Well, there goes the last of the Republican intelligentsia and good riddance. The Brigade will advance! Trumpeter, walk …march!”

—Charge of the Right Brigade

What Liberals Fear Most Is A Successful Trump Presidency, And Rightly So

 

The liberal anxiety surrounding a successful Trump presidency is creeping into our comment threads lately. You don’t even want Trump to succeed, do you?! True story. Why would we ever want more people like him in power? The liberal intelligentsia is focusing on the carnage, post Trump’s downfall. Knowledge, like the GOP itself, is a burden. There’s a non-published Zano article in the archives that weighs all the potential outcomes of a Trump presidency and, yes, a triTrumphant term ranked rather low on the scrotum poll. What?! A Trump win is not going to happen, which is precisely why that post languishes in the Discord draft folder, right alongside my debunked theory: Is The Dark Web Entirely Comprised Of Dark Matter? Sorry folks, but Donald J. Trump is poised for a mega-fail, and sooner rather than later. A full Trump victory lap in 2020 is about as remote as the hut of an Aleutian tribesman suffering from social anxiety.

The Trump Doctrine: Tweet Oftly And Carry A Big Button

Only one year into this cocky horror picture show and our Republican friends are already circling the old wagons. Much uncertainty clouds the onset of year two of the Greatest Administration on Earth, so it’s time for some more prognostic magic. As for the Russia-probe, the surprising effectiveness of the Hannity-led attacks on the FBI and Mueller’s team is muddying the waters. No matter how wrong Republicans get, doubling down with mindless distractions seems to serve them well. The difference with this round? The rule of law itself hangs in the balance. We are now faced with two terrible choices: Jeff Sessions remains the Attorney General and further militarizes the police, re-ignites the failed war on drugs, tramples state-laws, destroys a ton of new businesses, all while stuffing our prisons to the brim with more non-violent offenders, or choice two: Sessions is sent packing in the next couple of weeks or months in favor of a new AG who, before taking the job, agrees to reign-in the Mueller investigation. For this scenario there is clearly the potential for a more successful Saturday Night Massacre, one that allows an indictable ass-clown to remain in office. Archibald Cox sucker? But fear not, I know how this all ends! (Hint: think Rogue One meets Bambi’s mother over at The Green Mile.)

Disparity, What’s Your Policy? E Deplorable Unum: Out Of The Tax Plan Rides The One Percent

The U.S. just received one of the worst disparity of wealth scores among developed countries by the World Economic Forum, and this dismal achievement occurred before the pending carnage of Trump’s new tax plan. Luckily Republicans can’t discern if any country, or if any thing is even developed [Roy Moore joke removed by the editor]. Today our nation’s disparity trails even Russia’s …you know, the country at least partly responsible for our current State of the Union. From Russia with Lube? St. Petersbugger? Katherine the Make America Great Again? [Roy Moore’s horse joke removed by the editor].

Sorry, it’s a condition, please continue…

Executive Decree? Trump To Write Check To End Balances

With infallible regularity, each and every news cycle the rightwing alchemists transmute the obscene and the aberrant into mainstream gold. We may well be on the verge of another Nixon-style Saturday Night Massacre Saturday, but instead of the resignation speech to follow we’ll probably see a pre-Iraq-invasion like ‘next logical step.’ Fox News Alert: Most Deem The Firing Of Mueller’s Team ‘Inevitable’. Did Mueller Even Give Trump A Choice? The success of such a profound fib will signify the mystical conversion of logic into illogic, truth into lies, freedom into tyranny. Despite all rhyme or reason, the ongoing transmutation of reality into Foxal matter continues. Even my supposed truth-seeking blogversary remains complicit in the death throes of our republic. Nice.

How long can a party continue to support an ideology that prefers pedophiles to progressives? On that note, stay tuned for my open letter to Republican ignorance…

Donald Trump Is Al Frankenstein’s Monster

Mick Zano seems a tad defensive about Ken Wilber’s assertion that Left wing nuttiness built the “Post-Truth” environment we find ourselves in, a place where both The Daily Discord and Donald J Trump can thrive (full debate, here). I don’t blame the Trump Presidency completely on the Democrats, but there is a healthy slice of Trump humble pie progressives must ingest if we hope to advance into a new day, complete with fruitful dialogue between reasonable adults. Obviously, if there had been no two-term presidency of George W. Bush’s foreign and domestic blunders, there would be no President Barack Obama. Similarly, if the subsequent eight years had not occurred there’d be no President Trump.

A Review Of Zano’s Review Of Wilber’s “Trump And A Post-Truth World”

Someone needs to put Zano back in his place and that someone is me! He’s starting to get a little too smug in his old age and sometimes he needs reminded he’s not a Jedi yet. This is a rebuttal of sorts to his feature: A Review Of Ken Wilber’s ‘Trump And A Post-Truth World’: Or, How I Stopped Evolving And Learned To Love The Trump. First off, Wilber is correct in his assessment of the problem. Post-modernism has promoted an individualistic pluralism that assumes that all values are self-constructed and relative; therefore the only true value is tolerance. But there is no way to come to a consensus on any given disputed moral issue. Every individual is free to do whatever they want so long as they stay clear of the legal restraints. The problem? A nation without virtue, rots from within. Also, a blog without merit sews only Discord. Snap. For a crash course in virtue-rot I refer to Exhibit A: Mick Zano’s undergraduate studies. Kidding, Zano (sort of).

A Review Of Ken Wilber’s ‘Trump And A Post-Truth World’: Or, How I Stopped Evolving And Learned To Love The Trump

Ken Wilber is often hailed as the smartest guy you never heard of. For an ‘integral’ part of his theory, Wilber built on Jean Gebser’s work on societal and evolutionary development, which suggest societies move through levels of consciousness as they grow, ie: tribal, fundamental, entrepreneurial, liberal, infinity and beyond. Buzz Enlightenedyear? Throughout his tenor, Wilber has generally ignored republican antics in favor of lib coaching (Summary Alert: with deeper levels of consciousness, comes greater responsibility). In Trump And A Post-Truth World, Wilber labels the main pitfall of liberals as ‘aperspectival madness’, or how pluralism (moral-relativism) has paved the way for this truthless post-modern landscape. Progressives tend to insist that all perspectives are equal and, in such a world, truth itself dissolves into an egalitarian nightmare. He also points to the onslaught of fake news as contributing to the problem and how search engines are weaponizing shitty viewpoints by trading meaning for popularity. He rails against click-bait, which *cough* reminds me, before reading further please like and share my Man Trapped On Whataburger Roof Calls 911 For Rising Cholesterol Levels.