Epic Colorado Flooding Blamed on Dems Attempt at Gun Control

Epic Colorado Flooding Blamed on Dems Attempt at Gun Control

Denver, CO—God and the NRA are of a single voice, attempt gun control measures and face serious consequences. After two Democratic senators attempted such legislation in the Rocky Mountain state, Republicans successfully recalled them as God mustered a taste of his 40 days and 40 nights routine. The NRA rallied Colorado Republicans to recall the two Democratic senators who supported gun control and God sent a message of his own in the form of water, rocks and mud.

“I coordinated with the NRA on this one,” said God. “I thought about smiting shit right away, but LaPierre over at the NRA said ‘hey, let’s wait and do this thing right.’ Not many people realize I almost added the commandment: Thou shalt not impede thy neighbor’s right to shoot shit. But, then I couldn’t think of another word for shit. Remember, I wrote this crap long before the advent of Thesaurus.com.”

When asked if this was a test for an upcoming, more global, deluge God laughed, “No options are off the tablet. Look, I’m torn about ending humanity this time. I hate liberals, but I love reality television and Netflix so it’s a tough call.”

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Mick Zano

Mick Zano

Mick Zano is the Head Comedy Writer and co-founder of The Daily Discord. He is the Captain of team Search Truth Quest and is currently part of the Witness Protection Program. He is being strongly advised to stop talking any further about this, right now, and would like to add that he is in no way affiliated with the Gambinonali crime family. 

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