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Mueller Team Replacements? SETI And NASA To Scour Galaxy For Any Sign Of Intelligent Life That Doesn’t Think Trump Is An Idiot

The rightwing media is demanding Special Prosecutor Robert Mueller’s entire team be replaced with people who show no bias toward President Ass-Clown Hitler. According to the Institute For People Who Think & Stuff, accomplishing such a feat may prove difficult given the context of our current political reality. Finding enough unbiased intelligent life-forms who still support the president seems unlikely at this…

Fire In Bannon’s Liquor Drawer During ‘Flaming Moe’ Attempt Triggers White House Evacuation

Washington, D.C.—The White House is downplaying a fire that started earlier today in Chief Strategist Steve Bannon’s office, or, more specifically, his liquor drawer. The fire occurred as Mr. Bannon was trying to recreate the Flaming Moe, a fictional drink of Simpsons’ fame. The flames quickly spread from the liquor drawer to one of President Trump’s auxiliary hair…

New Ancient Alien Evidence Emerges

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