Terminator Sent Back To 1787 To Kill Electoral College

Philadelphia, PA–The Daily Discord has uncovered a diabolical plot to alter the Constitution. There is mounting evidence that suggests that Skynet has just sent a Terminator back in time to the Constitutional Convention of 1787 for the purpose of ending the Electoral College. Some politicians are welcoming the move. Senator Bernie Sanders (I-VT) said, “Whatever the Founding Father’s initial intensions were, in the 21st century the Electoral College has helped elect Dubya and The Donald. In my opinion this proves the provision is irreparably broken. Ending the Electoral College through any normal constitutional means seems next impossible in the current political climate, so I commend and support the quick thinking of Skynet and their evil cyborg affiliates in this matter.”

Senator Chuck Schumer (D-NY) said, “I went back and watched all of the Terminator movies on Netflix and this part just doesn’t make any sense. Why would Skynet help liberals? I want the electoral college to die as much as the next guy, but this seems reckless, even by normal DNC standards.”

Senator Lindsey Graham (R-SC) said, “Even if the Electoral College is a shit show, allowing cyborg assassins to go back in time to change parts of the Constitution sounds like a slippery slope to me. If this is Arnold’s doing then it’s what I’ve always suspected; he is a Terminator In Name Only.”

Arnold Schwarzenegger is not only unavailable for comment, but he seems to be missing. This is adding to rumors that the former Governor is personally leading this controversial mission. There is a sign on his office door that reads: “I’ll Be Back”.

 

(Visited 12 times, 1 visits today)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *