Cheap Parler Tricks Courtesy Of Deplorabus Unum

Conservative Americans feel slighted and forever persecuted and with good reason, they are. Most Americans are over their whole if-you-don’t-like-the-results-flip-over-the-graph line of reasoning. They’re not going to stop peddling their conspiracy theories anytime soon or, more accurately, ever. The right has a threefold approach to making their Fantasy Island become a new reality for us all. First, abandon existing journalism outright. If anyone was still wondering, this phase is complete. Second, find a social media platform that’s, how should I say it? …think post-lobotomy Walter Mitty. Then, for the pizza-gate de resistance, you just have to create a news network that will make Fox seem, well, fair and balanced. As for this dark web I’m forced to live vicariously through my blogvesary, who’s up to his old Parler tricks.

*The headline is Roman for ‘out of the many, dumb.’ I think.

These social media platforms and “news” networks of the near future will effectively shave even more IQ points off their viewers. Many of you are thinking: But, Zano, they have to have reached maximum incapacity in 2020? I realize that post-Trump such a sentiment seems counter intuitive, but, remember, so are they.

The Discord was among the first blogs to really talk, at length, about the rightwing’s determination to remove itself from this reality. Here’s an article on a comment thread gone horribly wrong in 2011. That particular incident was triggered by my insertion of some CBO financial estimates into an otherwise Deplorable-driven FB-thread sometime amidst the last financial collapse.

Here’s the Atlantic’s take yesterday: Right-Wing Social Media Finalizes Its Divorce From Reality. It’s nice to see the liberal elite catching up to a spoof news blogger. As for social media platforms, Parler is the latest greatest republican avatar. The run of the mill social media platforms should suffice for any plucky populist movement bent on railing against the man, but not so for the US version. These folks are too retro-industrious for Facebook and Twitter. They need a place where they are free to shove the 1st Amendment up someone’s ass. I was a member of a Tomi Lahren and a pro-Trump group for several years, you know, just to keep the pulse of the EKG and EEG of the people devoid of those associated organs.

[Scarecrow and Tin Man joke snatched by flying monkeys.]

I dropped these groups a few months ago after seeing a thread pop up on my feed that made me want to report them to, well, the man. It was stunning, yet par for the courseness. The post in question showed a picture of a black man spray-painting something on the front of someone’s house. No information, no backstory, just an image taken from somewhere at some time and posted at the height of the BLM movement.

The person who posted it said something like, would it be so bad if we started to do something about these people? (paraphrased). I did not screenshot this post, but it had about 50 likes and about 12 comments, because it had only recently been posted, but not one person said, Dude? WTF? or even Chill out. All were ‘likes’ or ‘hearts’ and the comments ranged from sympathetic to genocidal.

Let me be clear, there is no liberal meetup group on Earth, even from ANTIFA central, wherein someone wouldn’t try to tamp that shit down a notch. I have seen a ton of hateful liberal rants on social media, some even from other than myself, but you’re never going to find an entire group of liberals placating genocide. There are always adults, gatekeepers, or principled people to steer the group back toward reason. There are no such individuals left in the wasteland known as the GOP.

While my friend and blogvesary stoked his own pack of rowdy republicans, he recently complained about our old college friends “giving him a hard time” about his posts. Poor Poke. Educated people, pointing out the obvious. I stopped commenting on his feed when someone suggested I go home liberal and watch Cuties. When I say R is ten times more radicalized and dangerous than D, Poke, that’s a conservative conservative estimate (CCE).

Today these social media platforms are calling them out, so they’re taking their shitshow further down the nimrod path. Republicans seek a fact-free zone, a conservative safe space of sorts and Parler seems to be trying to fill this important niche for our fact-deficient freundin. It’s not a huge platform yet, but it’s growing in leaps and clowns because too many republicans are becoming uncomfortable with the inconvenient truths sneaking into their bubble of non-reality. Acknowledging the election for someone who handily won both the electoral college and the popular vote? Yeah, that’s not going to sit well.

Social media will be the gateway drug to our pending newsmaxian dystopia where people across the heartland can find one another and grow their movement. Whereas I have been encouraging republicans to create a stronger conservative intelligentsia, instead they want to take dumb down a notch.

This graph from Ad Fontes shows the extent of a particular publication’s media bias:

To bring this home, we’ve had three main republican voices here on The Discord and all three continually share far-right links or themes from publications deemed ‘nonsense damaging to public discourse.’ This would be Exhibit A as to why they never seem to offer valuable insights. One of our old contributors tends to continue to link to the likes of GatewayPundit, Breitbart and Red State on FB. Not to be outdone, my blogvesary just shared something straight from Parler.

How do you win when they say, well, if the real media isn’t covering it, there’s probably something there? Oh, there’s something there all right, but nothing a tinfoil hat can’t block.

I have only had a few dubious links creep into the ‘unfair persuasion’ category here on the ‘Cord: the Daily Kos, Salon, and one link to The Huffington Post, but that’s the list since 2006. And I knew even when I linked to these they were left-leaning publications because I tend to gravitate toward unbiased analysis.

I have always pointed to CNN’s decision to just give equal time to R and D and then cut to a commercial. In the guise of appearing impartial, they abdicated their duty to the truth. They owned up to this to some degree in 2016, but I warned them years earlier:

“They (CNN) hired MCs, not journalists. You can say any extreme and idiotic statement you want, left or right, and their anchors will simply smile and say, ‘Next up the dancing bear!’ They are not neutral, they’re flat line.”

Pains me to admit it, but there are still journalists on Fox News; Chris Wallace comes to mind, but eventually these folks get in the way of a good false narrative. Enters Newsmax, a network created by a Mar-a-Lago gold member and a news crew still clinging to the hull of the S.S. Trumptanic. If Trump doesn’t end up in jail, it is very likely he will create a news network even more friendly to the reality impaired. These will be the days worth living for…

Here is where this post was supposed to end.

As I moved to post I did comment on a Pokey FB thread. Just for fun. I did not intentionally poke the bear, much, but my comment spurred an old Discord contributor (R), the only other R Discord contributor not mentioned, to say something like what makes you an authority on what publications are reputable? Having already written this bit, I had that media bias chart handy. Oh, and he was questioning my link from Reuters …you know, top of the chart ‘strictly fact reporting’ category. That triggered this exchange:

This same guy, in full projection mode, said I was making personal attacks several weeks ago. Sure, I don’t believe republicans are the sharpest tools in the shed; think spork abandoned in a rock tumbler, but it’s time they started to understand the pattern here. They need to realize the clear and present danger that their ongoing brain farts represent to us all. Look in the mirror, your party gives the word shitshow a bad name.


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Mick Zano

Mick Zano

Mick Zano is the Head Comedy Writer and co-founder of The Daily Discord. He is the Captain of team Search Truth Quest and is currently part of the Witness Protection Program. He is being strongly advised to stop talking any further about this, right now, and would like to add that he is in no way affiliated with the Gambinonali crime family. 

  22 comments for “Cheap Parler Tricks Courtesy Of Deplorabus Unum

  1. Pokey
    December 5, 2020 at 12:35 AM

    Again you misrepresent my comments—I never said I was upset because our old college friends said “giving him (me) a hard time” about his (my) posts.” I post for the purpose of people giving me a hard time about my posts. I want people who disagree with me to show me where I am in error—and on those occasions when people show me that I am in error, I thank them.

    Not only did you take comments I said to you in private about other people and make them public, you totally misrepresented what I said.

    I checked; in a private conversation with Zano I wrote—“Most people on the Left hate good information. Anything that contradicts CNN they call a “conspiracy theory,” so I’m strategic in what I send people. I learned my lesson with (list of old college friends).

    That’s it. I wrote nothing else regarding our “old college friends.”

    I don’t mind at all people giving me a hard time. I do mind when people dismiss my perspective as a “conspiracy theory” without engaging in conversation or addressing the actual subject matter that I am presenting.

    I want people to “be hard on me” in showing me that my position is false, flawed, or in error, because that is how I learn. Increasingly, I find people just dismissive without even demonstrating that they have considered my perspective. That’s what I was complaining about—not that our “old college friends” were “giving me a hard time.” Just the opposite. I know our “old college friends” have strong opinions that clash with mine, and so many have insultEd my person by calling me a “conspiracy theorist” or a “lunatic” or “crazy,” and thus they dismiss my perspective as unworthy of consideration.

    Of course, it’s called adhominem; and it’s a logical fallacy.

    None of them, nor have you Zano, yet given me any non-partisan, fact based explanation of the origin, context and significance of the Steele Dossier and Flynn’s arrest.


    Is CNN’s coverage of the Steele Dossier “fake news?” If not; why not?

    • Mick Zano
      December 5, 2020 at 6:01 PM

      Retraction: You are correct, Poke. Sorry! I will try not to let private exchanges creep into the fray, but the main point is this: your latest attempt to discredit the election on FB with this Benford Law argument is at best not-helpful and at worst dangerous. That’s why people are being dismissive, they are dismissing the easily dismissable. We know the score, you still don’t. We call them crazy conspiracy theories because time and time again, Bob’s your uncle (pending DNA verification). And this isn’t like your some concerned citizen who just happened to throw out an interesting statistical anomaly amidst the height of a potentially insurmountable constitutional crisis. You’re clearly a shill for a rube. Retraction: you may be a rube for a shill. I’ll have to check my subsource.

      Even our DOJ does not agree with this latest premise of yours, nor does any federal judge, or any relevant journalist. You keep forgetting that you have the burden of proof today, not me. Another round of speculation from the disreputable is just that. I call if Foxal Matter.

      Why didn’t Trump’s lawyers float this Benford argument in court? Why is there no evidence other than your supposed statistical anomaly? Do I think those particular votes in PA—the ones that came in so heavily for Biden—should be further scrutinized? Sure. You misrepresent me when you think I don’t, but I understand how this is more about Trump finding a way to delegitimize the process. His behavior is obvious, yours less so. But if this theory of the day fades and if the crime boss is charged, then you need to realize how fanning the flames of a dumpster fire has consequences, for the vaccine rollout, for those waiting for a stimulus check, for our security as a nation, and for a number of foreign policy sticky wickets. This was never going to be a smooth transition because Trump is openly fascist. This is not covert socialism, Poke, it’s open fascism. Trump wants, above all else, to remain in power, and this is only heightened because of some pending legal jeopardy.

      Is it a coincidence that these factoids you peddle always originate from far right extremists? I have asked you to consider the source. Again, your half-baked theories never seem to pan out. And nothing good will come from a populist, anti-intellectual movement built on hate. I’m sure Parler will someday be integral in creating the next cult bent on beaming onto another passing comet (Hale-GOPP?), but it’s not going to help our society solve any of its problems, period.

      As for the Dossier, here we go again. But, yes, it was handled poorly by the media and the Feds. Did the prediction of the investigation meet the Woods criteria established by the FBI? Very debatable, but neither did any of the other ones Horowitz reviewed at random (actually only one did). When you read those words where does your mind wander off to? So Trump was singled out? I will bet this investigation was better predicated than most of the other ones Horowitz reviewed. The Dossier was raw intelligence so, what you’re failing to understand is this: if the Dossier was proven, we could skip right to the indictments …you know, just like if the election was actually over. This is how investigations work. Now my prediction was that they would find procedural errors and, based on our failing society as a whole, I predicted a lot of mistakes. That’s what happened here. Horowitz found a ton of errors across the board and, as a result, FISA reforms are thankfully about to be instituted

      But what they never found, even under profound pressure from our mad king, was any partisan wrongdoing. Strzok and Page are heroes in that: they, like most of us, identified the Trumpian threat in their personal lives, but apparently did not let that interfere with how they operated during the investigation. Kudos! Meanwhile, you don’t believe in the results of an investigation, you just believe in the journey. Don’t Stop Deceiving joke removed by the editor.

      A factoid is a factoid is a factoid and a pattern is a pattern is a pattern.

      • Mick Zano
        December 5, 2020 at 6:24 PM

        I actually tried to make this analogy today, in this comment, but couldn’t think of a punchline, ha ha… Good luck finding Bigfoot.

      • Pokey
        December 5, 2020 at 6:47 PM

        “Half-baked theory”—what exactly is my theory?

        Cut out all the spin and speculation. All I want to know—from the known public facts, what exactly is the origin of the Dossier, the context from which it became public and used as “intelligence,” and the significance.

        Was the media’s initial presentation of the Dossier “fake news?” Was the Dossier used to promote a conspiracy theory?

        From the publicly known facts, what were the motives and significance of Flynn’s investigation?

      • Pokey
        December 5, 2020 at 7:15 PM

        Here’s my theory based on the all the facts, conversations (public and private) of key players. You tell me exactly where I speak false or out of context—during 2016 election Clinton’s campaign paid a foreign spy to go to Russia and interview Russian spies to find dirt on Trump. This project became “the Steele Dossier.” Obama DOJ and high ranking members of the FBI and CIA were aware of the Dossiers origins during the 2016 election. A member of CIA notified the FBI and told them that Carter Page was working on good terms with the CIA. An FBI agent altered the document sent by the CIA about Carter Page. Instead of reading “Carter Page is working for us in Russia,” the email now read “Carter Page is NOT working for us in Russia.” Since the FBI could feign suspicion about Page, they used the Dossier to gain a FISA warrant and spy on Carter Page and subsequently they spy on Trump’s campaign through Page’s contacts. After Trump’s election, There was then a coordinated effort between Comey, Clapper, and CNN, where Comey was directed to tell Trump about the Dossier. After Comey informed Trump about the Dossier, Comey told Clapper, who informed CNN that the Dossier was a credible enough bit of information to have the head of the FBI inform the president about it. So now CNN treated it as a credible news story since “The President has been informed about this controversial Steele Dossier that alleges the Trump was compromised to Putin and that he coordinated with the Russians to affect the election.” This the “Trump Russia” conspiracy theory.

        Isn’t odd that when I tell this fact -based explanation as to what actually occurred it’s ME who is called the conspiracy theorist STILL.

        Is it correct what I just said? I think that it is. I’m typing off the cuff, so Sometimes I mix up the details. But I’m pretty sure that’s essentially it. I’ll stand corrected if I’m wrong.

        See how a person could learn something from reading what I just wrote about the document? But reading what you wrote about Steele Dossier doesn’t offer anything to learn. It’s a politically spun talking point.

        I’ve already explained this to you several times. I’m starting to think that some people really don’t want to learn.

        • Mick Zano
          December 6, 2020 at 4:12 PM

          This is a wonderful theory, Poke, if you could just overlook four major points, which apparently you can.
          1. What we know about your narrative is wholly legal under US law, with one notable exception: this intriguing switcheroo by a low level FBI agent. This is the factoid-lynchpin that holds all this Foxal matter and all these other alleged crimes together. Atlas Buggered.
          2. Two special counsels, appointed by a known Trump crony, attempted to prove exactly what you’re saying and have failed to connect any of these dots. Zero point zero zero. I realize Benghazi was garbage and got 6 or 7 investigations, so hope springs eternal.
          3. This becomes a more viable theory if there was no reason whatsoever to have investigated the Trump Administration on this matter in the first place, which, of course, is nonsense. Here’s a better summary: whereas parts of the dossier were confirmed, others remain false or inconclusive. But Mueller’s findings were damning, period. The Dossier confirmed wide range Russian interference in our election and it exposed endless meetings with a willing group of useful idiots on the US end. If the ‘salacious and unverified’ dossier was right twice that’s two more times than the entire GOP combined. Patterns. History is never going to say: ‘there’s nothing to see here, so why did they bother that nice man and his friends?’ They will judge them all harshly. Historians will then be asking what I have been, why wasn’t he ever been charged? How did the Feds F this up? Their work was shoddy and the consequences could not have been greater.
          4. None of the publications peddling this garbage have ever gotten a conspiracy theory right. They are disreputable publications that push nonsense damaging to the public discourse. To their credit, it’s working– discourse is now irreparably damaged. Is there a conspiracy exception? I can’t think of any. Spygate, as one of the shiny new ones, will eventually be added to the rest of that list of shit republicans say, thus the pattern. It, unlike your theory, remains elegant and flawless.

          Durham will be publishing his findings soon, and from those conclusions you can fill in some of these dots of yours. Meanwhile, patience, young grasshopper. We don’t want to shift this stuff over to the fail column before Sean Hannity can invent something else.

          • Pokey
            December 6, 2020 at 10:23 PM

            I didn’t give you theory. I simply stated what factually occurred. All you did was provide reasons to dismiss the facts. So what exactly did I say that was false, inaccurate, out of context, or misleading. How could I express it more accurately?

          • Pokey
            December 6, 2020 at 10:25 PM

            I’m not looking for authority to tell me “what to think.” I’m looking for the facts, and then I will think for myself. Now you try.

          • Pokey
            December 6, 2020 at 11:26 PM

            Tyrannies train citizens to look to authorized experts, who tell them WHAT to think. A Constitutional Republic depends upon citizens looking to the facts and learning HOW to think.

            • Mick Zano
              December 7, 2020 at 2:48 PM

              Well, for a free thinker you’re just a little late to the party. Peddling rightwing and Russian disinformation doesn’t seem like the best way to start an anti-fascist think tank. When you were directly asked what insights you’ve provided from your vast career as an independent thinker and you couldn’t name any, uh, that should have been your first clue that: independent thinking, you’re doing it wrong.

              I do agree, you have some facts there, selective ones lined up in a way as to help people arrive at a faulty conclusion, but facts nevertheless. If you start off with the presumption of innocence, even after all the findings You.Are.Lost. Trump has some clear culpability in and around the Russia probe so, with that in mind, let’s look at your list again.

              Pokey: during 2016 election Clinton’s campaign paid a foreign spy to go to Russia and interview Russian spies to find dirt on Trump. This project became “the Steele Dossier.”
              Zano: True and legal. One point, Danchenko that “Russian spy” is suing for slander because he was a known and respected subsource for James Bond and he does not agree with that particular label. Not typical Russian spy behavior, but who knows?
              Pokey: Obama DOJ and high ranking members of the FBI and CIA were aware of the Dossiers origins during the 2016 election.
              Zano: Sure, the judges involved in the FISA process were also aware, please review the term raw intelligence and legal campaign-opposition research. I want a 100 word essay on each by Wednesday.
              Pokey: A member of CIA notified the FBI and told them that Carter Page was working on good terms with the CIA.
              Zano: True, the CIA did its job.
              Pokey: An FBI agent altered the document sent by the CIA about Carter Page. Instead of reading “Carter Page is working for us in Russia,” the email now read “Carter Page is NOT working for us in Russia.”
              Zano: False! It was not capitalized! Ha! Gotcha ya. OK, true, this is the tantalizing factoid necessary for all rightwing schemes to foment. Charges were pressed in this matter, but thus far all indications are that he worked alone. Justice served. This could change, of course, but per Durham’s leaks that doesn’t seem to be the case. No case seems to be the case. No bombshell Horowitz, no bombshell Durham, no bombshell in the senate report. But where there’s smoke, there are pancakes, right? Makes sense.
              Pokey: Since the FBI could feign suspicion about Page, they used the Dossier to gain a FISA warrant and spy on Carter Page and subsequently they spy on Trump’s campaign through Page’s contacts.
              Zano: I agree. This is where the FBI was sloppy, which, again, per Horowitz, is the norm. But again, if there’s a wider conspiracy theory here that climbs up and over to Obama, where is this proof hiding? Maybe we need to sift through the rubble of Benghazi one last time.
              Pokey: After Trump’s election, There was then a coordinated effort between Comey, Clapper, and CNN, where Comey was directed to tell Trump about the Dossier.
              Zano: Amen, these criminals were already meeting with their Russian counterparts. That’s a common sentiment as this point, so Bravo, gents!
              Pokey: After Comey informed Trump about the Dossier, Comey told Clapper, who informed CNN that the Dossier was a credible enough bit of information to have the head of the FBI inform the president about it.
              Zano: Yes, the dossier was proved correct in two key ways: 1: Russia was interefering in our election, and 2. Trump was welcoming help and starting these clandestine meetings. Meanwhile, this to the background reality that Trump would not be allowed in the White House for a tour, security clearance wise, had he never been elected. Is this still news to you?
              Pokey: So now CNN treated it as a credible news story since “The President has been informed about this controversial Steele Dossier that alleges the Trump was compromised to Putin and that he coordinated with the Russians to affect the election.”
              Zano: Collusion and Trump’s level of comprimisedness has yet to be investigated. Again, Mueller sadly chose a very limited scope. And on collusion the Mueller investigation was thwarted by cronies, obstructed by the president, and stopped prematurely by Rosenstien. I know this all news to you, the actual news always is.
              Pokey: this is the “Trump Russia” conspiracy theory.
              Zano: Not even close, the Trump Russia theory is covered in the first sentence of Volume I of the Mueller report. Perhaps you didn’t delve that far into it.

              Here’s my theory, the Feds crossing their fingers this walking constitutional crisis was never going to be elected to the highest office in the land. They probably didn’t know how to handle any interim period prior to the election. Hillary had a 90% chance of winning, wonk wise, so why would the Dems have gotten invovled? The Feds did because of the very real and extreme security concern that Trump represented. Did they screw some of it up? Sadly. If only they had succeeded in exposing this clown. That’s the tragedy here.

              • Mick Zano
                December 7, 2020 at 11:43 PM

                I guess we gotta agree to disagree on this one…

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