Los Angeles, CA—The arriving radioactive plume from Japan can be fun for all ages, but taking some precautions is necessary. Remember that black light you had in your room as a kid? Well, it’s not going to be anything like that. The best place to enjoy the glow show this weekend is Southern California. The optimum way to view the radioactive plume is to get far away from city lights, which in the case of L.A. is probably best anyway. You might want to dress appropriately for the display, like in a radiation suit. The World Health Organization is not sure if the dangerous fallout will create mutant hordes, some giant prehistoric fire breathing creature, or just enlarge insects of some variety or another. Regardless, it’s best to be prepared—with a will.
There is a slight chance of growing an extra appendage or gills during the festivities. Although, gills might seem cool, don’t go in the water. It’s probably not safe. In the event of mutant hordes, keep in mind, they always return to their subterranean dwellings by dawn. So you just have to stay alive until then.
Upper winds are blowing the glowing plume right toward us, so all you need to do is grab your recliner and your iodine pills, kick back, and enjoy the show!
Good night and good….ahahahHHaaHHAAA. Giant crickets!!