Three Wise Men, Two Shepherds, One Camel Arrested for Crimes Against Secularism

Three Wise Men, Two Shepherds, One Camel Arrested For Crimes Against Secularism

San Francisco, CA—Chaos erupted Christmas Day amidst a live nativity scene as a number of people and animals alike were arrested by liberal activists. All of the participants in the reenactment of Jesus’s birth in Golden Gate Park were charged and detained for crimes against secularism. One wise man received a black eye during his arrest and a camel later asked The Discord, “Can you post this on Wednesday? I’ll explain later.”

“This isn’t the stone age,” said one eye witness. “The messiah needs to be born in a proper hospital with the mother under general anesthesia. Besides, the whole thing was set up less than a block from a government building, which clearly blurs the line of church state.”

Republican types believe this is more evidence of a War on Christmas. Senator Nancy Pelosi (D) was quick to counter. “Due to sequester cuts the nativity scene was grossly under secured, so don’t go there.”

Barack Obama is denying allegations that the nativity participants were water boarded at Guantanamo Bay. “Nonsense,” said Obama. “We did the deed over at the nearby naval base in Alameda. It is hoped our actions will allow countless atheists to sleep-in this Sunday, and we also knocked some frankincense into that one fella’. Wise man? More like wise ass.”

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Mick Zano

Mick Zano

Mick Zano is the Head Comedy Writer and co-founder of The Daily Discord. He is the Captain of team Search Truth Quest and is currently part of the Witness Protection Program. He is being strongly advised to stop talking any further about this, right now, and would like to add that he is in no way affiliated with the Gambinonali crime family.