Mizpah Hotel in Tonopah: Ghost Adventures V Ghost Blunders

Mizpah Hotel in Tonopah: Ghost Adventures V Ghost Blunders
Mick Zano

This time the Discord’s Search Truth Quest team batted cleanup for those Ghost Adventure goons. Apparently they missed more evidence during their investigation than the Keystone Cops on shrooms. I’m sick of cleaning up after your messes, Zack! The Case of the Mizpah Hotel would challenge both my understanding of the para-abnormal as well as my understanding of valet parking. Click on Full Story for some of our ghostly evidence and cool video!

Vegas Great Bald Tony and I checked into the Mizpah Hotel in downtown Tonopah on May 5th. This south central Nevada town is chock full of pleasantness. Everyone seems to smile and say, “How are you doing?” As a native New Yorker, I was perplexed by this behavior and remained unsure how to gesticulate an appropriate response.

The Mizpah featured ghost miners haunting the third floor, ghost children on the fourth floor, and the Lady in Red haunting the fifth floor. We actually tried to book the ‘death room’, as it were, but they said it’s too small for a rollaway and I’m not sharing a bed with Bald Tony, ghost or no ghosts. My desire to find the truth has its limits.

I should also mention the first floor is said to be haunted by the group from Ghost Adventures, whose ratings apparently slipped horribly after their shoot here. Yeah, we handed them their asses on this one. The usual. I know, I know, it’s what you’ve come to expect from spoof ghost investigators (SGI). But the only part of this place not haunted seemed to be the bar area, which pulls the sheets out from under my ectopilsner ghost theory (pardon the paranormal pun). We are not accustomed to investigations so far away from the place where fine ale is served. We were clearly out of our element and, as we would soon discover, trying to lure the ghost children back to our room, not only proved difficult but is clearly the wrong kind of creepy. In fact, it may even be a felony in certain astral planes.

Everyone we talked to had a tale to tell so many of the hotel staff are becoming junior ghost investigators themselves. We talked to Michael Payne on the restaurant side, who shared his own link: Paranormal Adventures Ep 1. While alone in the basement one time, he claims to have heard someone whisper, “Hey you”. This phrase surfaced time and time again as the spirits of the Mizpah are apparently huge Floyd fans.

The manager, Tracy McCormick, had a number of stories to tell and she and her husband only acquired the place last September. She gave us a private tour of the basement, where two miners were killed by a third who then proceeded to seal them into a back room. Edgar Allen Poe would be proud. Here’s what showed up in the vault.

For the love God, Montresor!
For the love God, Montresor!

For those of you who would say, just clean the lens, we never clean our lenses, ahh, point taken. But let me say this for the record, Vegas not-so-Great Bald Tony only took FOUR pictures during the ENTIRE ghost investigation and yet he managed to capture two of the most intriguing images. His excuse was actually, “Uh, the ghosts keep draining my batteries and I still want to take some pictures of Death Valley.” Really, dude?! You stopped taking pictures because you were getting too much action? On that note:

Cost for one night at the Mizpah $110.<br />Cost of two Double-A batteries $2.<br />Cost of a competent junior ghost investigator: priceless” /></td>
<td id=Cost for one night at the Mizpah $110.
Cost of two Double-A batteries $2.
Cost of a competent junior ghost investigator: priceless

Although neither of us felt anything strange during our stay on the most haunted floor of the hotel, we finally got to experience some ghost-related-equipment-malfunctions (GREM). Tony’s camera only worked outside of the vault and we captured this phenomenon in real time on our video segment at the end of this feature. The camera worked before and after he left the vault, but Tony reports similar problems with women. Coincidence?

One of the downstairs ghosts apparently wanted to get into a pillow fight. As I walked into a room near the vault in the basement a pillow fell onto the floor behind me. The pillow wasn’t there when we entered this area. Tracy, the manager, was actually the first to notice. No one saw the pillow fall to the ground, but I don’t think I was ever particularly close to the thing. If you look at the video, the area is in a bit of an alcove. I walked down the center of the room and the pillow landed several feet behind me. I certainly didn’t bump it. This part is also captured on our video segment.

Wow, I just Googled Tonopah Vault and the miners here are apparently prone to playing tricks on visitors. Story here.

Tracy encouraged us to talk to Gail, the fifth floor housekeeper, and she was amazing! She puts both the Ghost Adventures and STQ to shame. The images she captured on her cellphone over the years and the stories she told were both disturbing and astounding. She could have handed the Ghost Adventure gang her evidence (she was present for the shoot), but she chose not to. One of the images Gail captured shows a blood drenched Lady in Red. It’s a shocking photo. The woman was allegedly beaten and stabbed to death outside of room 502. This lady continues to prank Gail while she’s cleaning. We did some of that too, but only because we’re idiots. Sorry Gail!

Gail is a fan of the Lady in Red but swears she will never spend a night at the hotel. She found a ghostly message written on a mirror once that said, “Help me.” The Lady also gave her a pearl once (there are others who claim to have received such a gift). Gail’s, however, spun and rolled around uncontrollably soon after she found it. If Gail’s image is the real McCoy, the lady isn’t wearing red, she’s simply drenched in her own blood. Yikes. If there’s a medium available to help this lady crossover, I believe—as far as I believe—it would be a worthy endeavor. Before I was even shown the stunning apparition, I had a little luck in that spot. These three photos were taken right where she died and right where the apparition appears in Gail’s photo.

Outside Room 502
Outside room 502, Either the Lady in Red died here or she reaaaally needs a coffee.
Either the Lady in Red died here or she reaaaally needs a coffee.

Why do we keep getting these ‘dust orbs’ where people died? I do take more pictures in these old hotels, which is one explanation. Then, again, only two miners died in the vault and we captured dozens of orbs in one of Bald Tony’s shots. Maybe the miners were having a party. I don’t advocate inviting minors to any party (see: Havoc House incident 1989).

There are simply too many stories to recount them all, but there’s kids running around the hallways bothering the guests, there are prankster miners popping up all over the place, and there’s even one ghost who seems to frequent the hotel bathrooms as he is apparently still constipated in the hereafter.

[Deadamucil joke omitted by the editor].

Meanwhile, Zach and the Ghost Adventurers didn’t get as much help from the staff because, apparently…well, how do I say this judiciously?

Zano = charming

Zach = douchey

Sorry Zach, but the truth is out there. Meanwhile, I caught so many orbs with my camera I’m not posting all of them. Here’s a couple of the cooler ones:

Probably just the kids playing on the stairs again
Probably just the kids playing on the stairs again
Tony’s bald orb attracting others
Tony’s bald orb attracting others
Adjacent to the vault where the miners died
Adjacent to the vault where the miners died

And here’s our investigative grand finale…er, of sorts.

Mizpah Hotel

The Discord gang has never conducted a second ghost investigation of the same place, but this hotel has so many unanswered questions: were we really pranked by ghost miners in the basement? What were those hidden charges on our room bill? And what damage to the room? Kidding! We loved the place, the staff rocked and like Douglas MacArthur in Terminator 4, “I shall be back!” I also want to assure all of you that our desire to return to this wonderful old western hotel has nothing to do with the upcoming grand opening of their microbrewery. Nothing. But if my theory is correct, and ghosts manifest from ectopilsner, this brewery addition will only spice things up at an already very active para-abnormal hotspot.

I want to thank Gail, Tracy, Michael and the rest of the Mizpah staff for a great ghost adventure…wait, the Ghost Adventure guys suck… a great Search Truth Quest.

See you next time!

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Mick Zano

Mick Zano

Mick Zano is the Head Comedy Writer and co-founder of The Daily Discord. He is the Captain of team Search Truth Quest and is currently part of the Witness Protection Program. He is being strongly advised to stop talking any further about this, right now, and would like to add that he is in no way affiliated with the Gambinonali crime family.