Rahm Emanuel Named “Sith of Interest” in Death of Robert Novak

Washington, DC – Police questioned Rahm Emanuel shortly after the death of conservative journalist, Robert Novak, and they are now calling him a ‘Sith of interest’. Emanuel’s interview with the police only further implicated Obama’s Chief of Staff.

“Look,” said Emanuel, “sure we put the dead horse’s head in his bed, but we only wanted to scare the bastard.”

When asked at a press conference why he and several Secret Service Officers were recently questioning Novak, Emanuel replied, “He could have told me who really outed CIA operative Valerie Plame. Armitage was a fall guy. I told Novak, Plame or Pain. He chose poorly, is all, but that doesn’t mean I killed him.”

Our own Bald Tony prodded Emanuel further by asking, “Isn’t it true that a Sith Lord can cause a brain tumor similar to the one that killed Novak by manipulating the dark side of the Force?”

Emanuel dismissed the question just as our own beloved reporter crumpled into a lifeless heap. Emanuel chose to end the press conference by saying, “Who’s the Prince of Darkness now, bitch? Oh and Ozzy, watch your ass.”

In Loving Memory of the Great Bald One 2008 – 2009

He’s not quite dead….

He’s getting better….

(Visited 121 times, 1 visits today)
Mick Zano

Mick Zano

Mick Zano is the Head Comedy Writer and co-founder of The Daily Discord. He is the Captain of team Search Truth Quest and is currently part of the Witness Protection Program. He is being strongly advised to stop talking any further about this, right now, and would like to add that he is in no way affiliated with the Gambinonali crime family.