Philadephia, PA—The Daily Discord surrendered to authorities today after admitting they created the infamous photo plastered all over the media last week. The image caused quite a commotion.
Maria Juarez of Guatemala City said, “I recognized the location and shouted, ‘Our day care center! The Earth has devoured our children!’”
“We never thought it would get this far,” said Mick Zano, a Discord contributor. “The hole in the photo looks ridiculously large, spherical, and fake…like Michael Moore.”
CEO, Peirce Winslow, takes full responsibility for the incident.
“We picked this image out of four sink hole submissions. The first had a big eye at the bottom (heh, heh), the second had a Cthulhu-like tentacle coming up out of it, and the last one depicted Reid and Pelosi doing some jungle love action down there. I really didn’t understand that one. I decided to keep it simple—just the big hole—and then we submitted the thing to places, and wow! I wanted to correct the mistake, but sometimes good business is where you find it. And sometimes, just sometimes, that somewhere is at the bottom of a giant PhotoShopped hole in Guatemala.”
“We thought we could get away with it,” said Zano. “I mean, who reports live from Guatemala? We probably just fly over it with some secret Predator Blogs, or something. But, it got too big too fast, so our lawyer suggested we come forward. He’s a busy man, our lawyer.”
If something you submit gets too big, too fast for over four hours, consult your physician immediately.