Rosetta Scandal: Obama’s Blunders Deciphered!

Rosetta Scandal: Obama’s Blunders Deciphered!
Mick Zano

Are you having a hard time deciphering Obama scandals? Are you confused whether or not Obama should be impeached? Can you even keep all of these scandals straight? I have turned all of our 44th President’s scandals into fun, easily digestible cartoons. So in five minutes you’ll finally understand everything, or your money back!

Fast & Furious
Fast & Furious
Benghazi
Benghazi
IRS
IRS
NSA
NSA
Obamacare
Obamacare

A Special Comment:

I realize these are over simplifications, yet they still have more validity than any current GOP witch hunt. If Bush started Fast & Furious in 2006, which evidence suggests, who cares? We had real scandals to cover. If Obama had less embassy bombings than Bush, who cares? Violence in the Middle East? There’s a shock. Besides, Bush had too many such incidents to actually investigate—more of his strategery? And, if the IRS targeted liberal groups under Bush—which happened by the way, full story here—who cares! I don’t think any politically affiliated group should be tax exempt, D or R.

Soooo essentially for Obama’s impeachable offenses, Bush either did it, caused it, or had a higher body count. The ONLY time Obama really messed up was his “you can keep your policy” quote, which happens to be accurate for 96% of Americans. When did Bush ever get a 96? …on ANYTHING?! Certainly not on an IQ test.

Since it’s been so long since a proper presidential scandal occurred, let’s jog some memories, eh.

Bush Scandals

THESE are REAL scandals. Some are impeachable offenses, others carry the death penalty. And I didn’t have to write cute little cartoons to explain them, nor did I require hundreds of sensational headlines to tease out their meaning. They speak for themselves, loudly…oh, and then they culminated in a global economic collapse.

Why will Obama rank much higher than Bush, historically?

“Recoveries, however anemic, are better than global economic collapses and avoiding a war through diplomacy is always preferable to lying us into one.”

—Mick Zano

Obama is an immeasurably better Commander-in-Chief, as history will eventually attest. What I am angry with Obama about is how he allowed this false reality to fester. That is his only real scandal. And it’s too late now, the damage is done. Our president underestimated the extremism, the obstructionism and the propaganda of the right. I never did, in fact, it’s why I blog.

Most of today’s republicans have no place in Congress or the White House. I’m not sure they should even be able to drive a car, let alone carry a gun. And, regardless of who runs for the Dems in 2016, be it Hillary, be it Warren, be it Janeane friggin’ Garofalo that person has my full support, because the alternative would be…er, take it away Spengler:

GhostBusters Cross Streams

Spengler: It would be bad.

Venkman: I’m fuzzy on the whole good/bad thing. What do you mean, “bad”?

Spengler: Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light

…or, if that doesn’t work, just think about Michele Bachmann and a certain red button.

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Mick Zano

Mick Zano

Mick Zano is the Head Comedy Writer and co-founder of The Daily Discord. He is the Captain of team Search Truth Quest and is currently part of the Witness Protection Program. He is being strongly advised to stop talking any further about this, right now, and would like to add that he is in no way affiliated with the Gambinonali crime family. 

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