ObamaCare Unveils New “Fun Size” Healthcare Enrollments

ObamaCare Unveils New "Fun Size" Healthcare Enrollments

Washington, DC—With Obamacare out of extensions, yet far below enrollment goals, the President announced his strategy to close the gap. Eligibility for full enrollments for the Affordable Care Act ends on March 31st, but until then all those seeking insurance can also sign up for Obama’s new “fun size” coverage.

Those who sign up in January, will receive an autographed Obama picture and 10% off the penalties associated with the individual mandate. “And if you act now,” said Obama, “The NSA will stop listening in on your conversations for the rest of 2014!”

When cornered, Obama admitted the enrollment is symbolical and is not truly redeemable for any medical or behavioral health coverage, per se, but he urged Americans to have a heart, because the program offers some good piece of mind. “But, remember, the heart and mind aren’t really covered,” said Obama.

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Mick Zano

Mick Zano

Mick Zano is the Head Comedy Writer and co-founder of The Daily Discord. He is the Captain of team Search Truth Quest and is currently part of the Witness Protection Program. He is being strongly advised to stop talking any further about this, right now, and would like to add that he is in no way affiliated with the Gambinonali crime family.