Obama Clarifies PA Misstatement: Meant ‘Bible Thumping Hickwads’

While stomping for crowds in central Pennsylvania earlier this week, Senator Obama clarified his unfortunate remarks made earlier in his campaign. “When I said that you Pennsylvanians get bitter, and cling to your guns or religion, I forgot to add drugs and moonshine.” Obama made it clear he wanted to set the record straight, “Many of you young redneck bumpkins are now a bunch of strung-out slack-jawed junkies, and I want you Bible thumping hickwads to know that when I’m elected president I’ll be in your NASCAR-watching opossum-eating corner.”

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Mick Zano

Mick Zano

Mick Zano is the Head Comedy Writer and co-founder of The Daily Discord. He is the Captain of team Search Truth Quest and is currently part of the Witness Protection Program. He is being strongly advised to stop talking any further about this, right now, and would like to add that he is in no way affiliated with the Gambinonali crime family. 

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