Mothman Statue Toppled For Its Stance On ‘Light Bulbs Matter’

Point Pleasant, WV—To the backdrop of throngs of crazed, statue-toppling progressives, the Mothman statue that once stood at the heart of downtown Point Pleasant is no more. Mothman, a known larvae-owner with ties to both Mothra and the BeheMoth, was also despised for his role as a key member of the Light Bulbs Matter movement. The president tweeted today, “I remember when Mothman showed up in West Vagina, followed by Godzilla and that three-headed dragon thing. I know it was a tough time for everyone involved, but there were good cryptids on both sides of those protests.”

One Point Pleasant resident, who prefers to remain fictional, said, “Mothman is a symbol of oppression! Those Gypsy moths travel around everywhere, nocturnally pollinating and whatnot. Night f***ers, I call ’em.”

One woman, who still remembers when Mothman terrorized her community, said, “It was late in 66 when I distinctly remember thinking Mothman? Quick, hide all the sweaters! Why didn’t that thing head to the Old Woolen Mill in Cleveland, or further east to those damnable Woolrich people? A good old fashioned coal monster razing our town, now that would make more sense in these parts.”

[Silicosis the Cave Beast, Chubrapneumocabra, & Creature from the Black Lung joke removed by animal control.]

 

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Mick Zano

Mick Zano

Mick Zano is the Head Comedy Writer and co-founder of The Daily Discord. He is the Captain of team Search Truth Quest and is currently part of the Witness Protection Program. He is being strongly advised to stop talking any further about this, right now, and would like to add that he is in no way affiliated with the Gambinonali crime family. 

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