Screw You and the Deficit You Rode in On (a Zano Rant: Part Deux)

Mick Zano

You keep doing it.  All of you!  Rick, your post is great—no argument (well, a little argument).  It clarifies the Dems stupidity. I have mentioned the role of Clinton’s de-regulations in my own posts (as well as Dodd and Frank’s culpability on Fannie and Freddie). It certainly factored into my original estimates.  But, as usual, you are focusing on one turd in the corner, while you continually fail to see the massive pile of excrement right in front of you.  No, not the Daily Discord (geesh, everyone’s a critic).

Bush, the Tea Party, and Fiscal Conservatism for Dummies

The above budget deficit numbers show how waging two wars instead of one, with a side order of tax breaks for all, was actually the largest contributors to our debt.  Although, in Bush’s defense, he was responding to a Halliburton 2-for-1 deal.  But wait, if you start arbitrarily bombing the shit out of someone else by the end of this commercial, you’ll also get these faulty electrical systems.

Everyone at Fox continues to believe all we need is another war (Iran), and some more tax cuts (for the rich).  Again, I have been saying dumb and dumber all along.  I have always called the Dem contribution dumb, hardily a ringing endorsement, but you guys just always manage to lock in that dumber position, as if not to be outdone.

Not to sound anything like Senator Craig, but, “I am not, nor have I ever been a Democrat.”

Well, once, but I don’t like to talk about it.  Let’s blame the Dems for the entire 20% of the deficit that constitutes Fannie and Freddie (it’s not true, of course, but a chunk is certainly theirs).  But let’s assume you’re completely right—with no actual investigation—just the ‘he said, she said’ stuff.  What about the other 80% of our deficit?  Slipped your mind, eh?  It slipped Fox’s mind, that’s for sure.  Sometimes a 24/7 news cycle isn’t enough.  I never said that doubling down on Bush’s deficit was a good idea, so the right is right about something.  It happens, Forrest.

Everyone should have to read your article, Rick.  It’s a great review of Fannie and Freddie, as far as we can decipher it.  I want a full investigation too, but our government is far too corrupt for that. Don’t any of you get it yet?  Your candidate, D or R, is not going to help at this point, and if the only possible third party force we can muster now is actually vying for position of dumbest…well, if the fat lady isn’t singing, she’s certainly clearing her throat.

[Exhibit A: The BP oil spill]

Democrats:  It’s Bush’s fault (dumb: well, some validity)

Republicans: It’s Obama’s fault (dumber: well, some validity)

Tea Party: It’s the environmentalist’s fault (dumbest: no validity)

(You’ll find this equation works on most issues.)

There was a time when you were entitled to your own opinion, but not your own facts.  Those days are gone.  The media and politicians only push, and/or make up, their own numbers.  Funny how it always seems to jive with their ideology. And, if you prove something wrong over on MSNBC, as shitty as they are, they still make retractions.  Fox just makes a justification special on their faulty data.  I have been more astounded by the Foxeteer’s oblivion, because we’ve had eight years to contemplate Bush’s presidency and the learning curve is like BP on Quaaludes.  The best part of W. dribbled down his father’s oil rig.  And if there was no Barney Frank, it would be necessary for Fox to invent him.  And someone at the Weekly Standard would have written a great article on how [imaginary figure 1] destroyed America (and just when Bush was going to let free markets reign and send us all to friggin Disney Land).

The Republican-supporting Tea Party movement is a reaction to fiscal conservatism gone horribly wrong.  So they will swing this pendulum way too far to the right in a reaction against their own voting records.  They will cut everything from every state budget and wonder why it didn’t work (unless you are a mortician).  Every politician in AZ is running right now on “cutting all spending across the board.”  In other words, destroying our infrastructure, our way of life, and bringing us to a Bangladesh level of services (BLS).  BLS, we’re not the ones who make the Prozac, we’re the ones who will deny it for the severely mentally ill in the name of tax breaks. 

Yes, they will need their guns.  We are currently sentencing many to die, with or without Arizona’s Prop 100.

A few years from now they will begin to understand the implications of their, ahum “decisions.”  I get the fact that we’re broke, but when schools, hospitals, and social service programs collapse, then they will realize the woes of rebuilding them from scratch on the tax payer’s dime.  That’ll save money, fer sure.  They will also see how such a collapse is not good for the local economies.  Lose, lose…or, as I call it, The Fox News All Stars

I am mad at Obama for very different reasons than the Foxeteers. He hasn’t restored the rule of law.  This doesn’t bother you, because freedom’s just another word for, well, Fox tells you what freedom is or isn’t and you shouldn’t disagree with them. Funny how their version of freedom tends to coincide with their stock options.  Remember, Fox still always has one nice thing to say about Bush: the Bush tax cuts worked.  So look at the chart again.  Now, stare at it until you can see the sail boat.

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Mick Zano

Mick Zano

Mick Zano is the Head Comedy Writer and co-founder of The Daily Discord. He is the Captain of team Search Truth Quest and is currently part of the Witness Protection Program. He is being strongly advised to stop talking any further about this, right now, and would like to add that he is in no way affiliated with the Gambinonali crime family.