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June 20, 2013
NEWS FLASH: DAILY DISCORD NOW SPORTING NEW FORMAT, VIDEOS, ETC....AND I POSTED IT NAKED (TRUE STORY)
• ON PRESSURE FROM HOMELAND SECURITY DISCORD CANCELS ITS "HUG A SUICIDE BOMBER DAY" • BUTTON FLY JEAN COMPANY ESTABLISHES NO FLY ZONE OVER GAP • FIRST DISCORD ORIGINAL VIDEO "BONEFOOT" IS SET TO PREMIERE ON JUNE 19TH RIGHT HERE! CHECK YOUR SPAM FOLDERS • MAN TASERED 423 TIMES BY POLICE CLAIMS LAST 72 TIMES "UNNECESSARY" • ALICE KRAMDEN TO BE AMONG FIRST ON VIRGIN FLIGHT TO MOON • IS THE DAILY DISCORD SECRETLY SUPPLYING SYRIAN REBELS WITH JOKES? •
Topics
Arts & Culture
BONEFOOT!
47-Year-Old Discovers Function of Cart Corrals
COMING SOON!
Taser Parties: Tase Me Again, Bro!
Ninja Porn Now Available On The Discord
Discord Apology XXII: Into Retractness
Star Trek: Into Beigeness
Ghetto Shaman Vows to be the First to Fly 23-Ton Lego X-Wing Model
Boy Scouts Recognize Gay Youths!
Crawdads Protest Outside of Discord Tower
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News & Politics
Acronym Scandal Kit Score (ASKS):
Fast & Furious Organizers Selected to Arm Syrian Rebels
Israeli Site Rape or: How I learned to Stop Worrying and Love Surveillance
Snowden Releases All Personal Emails from X-Girlfriends
GOP Strains Something Trying to Link Obama to IRS Scandal
Eric Holder’s
I Purged Myself Today
Tops Charts
GOP: Debt, Delusion, and Drudge
Michelle Obama’s Heckler Added To Terrorist Watch…
Bloomberg Responds to
Operation: Glazed Donut Greasewich
If I Had a More Powerful Telescope, Amy...
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Science & Technology
Antpocalypse Now: Crazy Ants Drive out Fire Ants
Massive Ice Deposits Found in Man’s Freezer
As An Avid Shark Week Watcher...
New Technology Lets Blind See Porn
Has Anyone Seen My Contact Lens?
Voted Best Product 2012: Tens of Thousands of Zombie Feeders Recalled
Putin Downplaying Lake Vostok Zombie Outbreak
WHO: A New Wave of Superbugs Pose Dire Threat
WARNING: Cialis May Cause Public Bathing in Seperate Bathtubs
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Spirituality & Enlightenment
Ask the Ghetto Shaman
The Horny Goat Weed Question
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
I Don't Always Invent Obama Scandals
God Targeting the Tea Party with Hail and Shit
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Space For Sale
My Life in Retail: Part One
Alex Bone’s Get Poor Quick Scheme
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Sports
Beasts & Men with Tits: Unsung Heroes of the NFL
Oprah Admits to Using Ratings Enhancing Drugs
The Annual Pine Forest Pick-Up Games Commence
New London Connecticut Mistakenly Prepares for Olympics
Kings Draft New Assistant Coach
Knowing No Hockey Customs, L.A. Kings Just Stare at Stanley Cup Until Fans Leave
Garbage Basketball a Lost Art for One Man
Go Coyotes! No, Really...You Can Move to Seattle
Uh Oh, Tebow's Getting Weird
Winnipeg Wilderness Wipes out Warm Weather Wussies
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Weird & Haunted Travel
Ghost Busted: Team Discord Bested by Rank Amateur
HIKE: A Four Letter Word for a Reason
Bart Simpson Claims responsibility for "Nightmare Cruise"
The Haunted Palace at Prescott’s Whiskey Row
Plight of the Phoenix: How I Stopped Worrying About On-Coming Traffic and Learned to Love the Valley
Interview by a Vampire
Durango and the Haunted Hotel Hatrick
Haunted Silverton: A Grand Imperial Poltergeist
Ouray’s Western Hotel: A Very Brady Slaughter House
Haunted Colorado or Rocky Mountain High-Ya-Yay
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Contributors
Pierce Winslow
Israeli Site Rape or: How I learned to Stop Worrying and Love Surveillance
Space For Sale
It's Alive, It's ALIVE!
GOP Reveals Vision For Upcoming Budget Negotiations
GOP Furious with Obama's Permanent Changes to the Capitol Building
Aliens Determined to Gangnam Style!
Another 2012 Apocalypse Theory
We Should Win A Pulitzer for This!
Twitanic
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Alex Bone
COMING SOON!
Taser Parties: Tase Me Again, Bro!
Crawdads Protest Outside of Discord Tower
Alex Bone’s Get Poor Quick Scheme
Thai Porn Restaurants Linked to Dolphin Exploitation
Amazon Buys Out All Major Grocery Store Chains
Men Officially Concede Battle of the Sexes
Gun Enthusiasts Use Zombie Threat to Justify Arsenals
Alien Invaders Distressed Over Failed Apocalypse
Discord Resorts to Black Magic to Increase Ratings
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Mick Zano
COMING SOON!
The Horny Goat Weed Question
Ghost Busted: Team Discord Bested by Rank Amateur
Scandal Quest: Would the Real Scandal Please Stand Up
Mother Road Brewing and Deschutes Unite!
A Victory for Gun Owners or for Gun Sellers?
Conservative Legacies: Just Say No
The "Media Research" Center
The Republican Scandal Identifier Kit
The Darker Corner of The TwiRight Zone
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The Crank
Star Trek: Into Beigeness
My Life in Retail: Part One
New York Guido Meets Arizona Gun Show
Beasts & Men with Tits: Unsung Heroes of the NFL
The GOP: Snatching Defeat from the Jaws of Victory
Cranky Predictions for 2013
Catitude: The Cat's Domestication of Mankind
Plight of the Phoenix: How I Stopped Worrying About On-Coming Traffic and Learned to Love the Valley
You Bastards! You Blew It All to Hell!
Dear Fox News
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Erisa Brahe
Antpocalypse Now: Crazy Ants Drive out Fire Ants
New Technology Lets Blind See Porn
Pope Seeks Retirement Advice from Emperor Palpatine
Dino Farts the Cause of Prehistoric Global Warming?
Cannibals Offended by the Name Zombie
Russian Prehistoric Lake Drilling Unleashes Zombie Plague!
The Ghetto Shaman
Ask the Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
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Tony Ballz
The Worst Song Ever Written
Brah!!
Beer And Bloating In Camp Verde
Zombienomics or Night of the Living Prez
It's The Water!
Beyond Irony or Rickrolling in A Pink Unicorn T-shirt
A-Crock-O-Shit Now
Opinions on Politics by a Non-Voter
Records Are Great
NERDS!!!!!
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Bald Tony
HIKE: A Four Letter Word for a Reason
Chinatown Vegas: You Go Now!
Vegas San Gennaro: Leave the Feast, Take the Cannoli
Another One Bites the Dust
And now for Something Completely Celtic
The First Rule of Pizza Club is
Don’t Talk About Pizza Club
Flagstaff’s Big Red Poor
The Heart Attack Grill Charged with Assisted Suicide: No Charge, Cash Only
Porn Free: One Cabby’s Vegas Tail
The Danger and Intrigue of Live Girl Billboards: Turning Road Rage into Road Raging Hard Ons
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BONEFOOT!
COMING SOON!
More Videos...
Obama Linked to Irish Potato Famine of 1845
Scandal Quest: Would the Real Scandal Please Stand Up
I Don't Always Invent Obama Scandals
God Targeting the Tea Party with Hail and Shit
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
“Beware the Irrational, However Seductive”
—Christopher Hitchens
Obama Smacks Baby, Drops Pants, and Screams Allahu Akbar!
The Worst Song Ever Written
Untitled
NASA to Melt Down Armstrong Statue to Meet Payroll
Space For Sale
My Life in Retail: Part One
Untitled
Indiana Woman Suing Juan Valdez
Let's Combine Nationalism, Religion, and Propaganda!
Angered Christie to Fight the Next Sandy with Sand!
Mother Road Brewing and Deschutes Unite!
It's Alive, It's ALIVE!
Massive Ice Deposits Found in Man’s Freezer
Brah!!
“Why is the President afraid to use the word terrorist?” --Dennis Miller
Bush Library Added to List of War Crimes
Alex Bone’s Get Poor Quick Scheme
W Says Jeb is the Man for 2016
School Fieldtrip Visits Last Moderate Republican
A Victory for Gun Owners or for Gun Sellers?
The Cycle of Wife
After Ricin & Boston Attack U.S. To Invade Germany
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Conservative Legacies: Just Say No
Discord Musical
Quest for Fiber
Flops!
Seven Mythical Creatures Dead after Botched Narnian Drone Attack
HIKE: A Four Letter Word for a Reason
As An Avid Shark Week Watcher...
Holder Reveals Plan to End 2
nd
Amendment
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ghidorah vs. Mozilla
Flops At Box Office!
Drummer of Popular Band Still Alive at 30
The "Media Research" Center
Republicans Look to Return to a Simpler Time
The Easter Story Cover Up
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
New Technology Lets Blind See Porn
Has Anyone Seen My Contact Lens?
Local Man Remembers Middle School As "Being Larger"
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Thai Porn Restaurants Linked to Dolphin Exploitation
The Shroud Of The Dirty War Has Fallen...
Obama Calls for "Courage" In Face of Pending Release of Discord Videos
New York Guido Meets Arizona Gun Show
Voted Best Product 2012: Tens of Thousands of Zombie Feeders Recalled
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
The Republican Scandal Identifier Kit
CPAC Summary: This Time Let's Get Crazy Right!
Putin Downplaying Lake Vostok Zombie Outbreak
Amazon Buys Out All Major Grocery Store Chains
GOP Reveals Vision For Upcoming Budget Negotiations
Vatican Bought By Target
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Beer And Bloating In Camp Verde
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