Sarcastically Salving Society
Home of the Transcosmetic Party
A Place for Raging Moderates, Tragic Optimists, and Integral Outcasts
May 21, 2013
"THIS IS NO ORDINARY SCANDAL" – PEGGY NOONAN • "TRUE, ORDINARY SCANDALS TEND TO MAKE SENSE AND ARE ASSOCIATED WITH SOMETHING CALLED FACTS" – MICK ZANO • SENIOR CITIZEN PROSTITUTION RING CAUSES OUTRAGE, NAUSEA • EMAIL AT THE HEART OF THE BENGHAZI "SCANDAL" WAS DOCTORED... "WELL, IF A DOCTOR WROTE IT, IT MUST BE TRUE" -- THE GOP • DESPITE REPUBLICAN OPPOSITION, CARBON LEVELS ARE AT THEIR HIGHEST IN THE LAST THREE MILLION YEARS • AS FOR THE IRS MESS, THE GOP IS LOSING COUNT OF ALL THE OBAMA SCANDALS... THEY APPARENTLY CAN’T COUNT TO ONE • "IS BENGHAZI BECOMING A WATERGATE, OR IRAN-CONTRA, OR BOTH?" —VICTOR DAVIS HANSON •
Topics
Arts & Culture
The Worst Song Ever Written
Indiana Woman Suing Juan Valdez
Mother Road Brewing and Deschutes Unite!
It's Alive, It's ALIVE!
Brah!!
Discord Musical
Quest for Fiber
Flops!
Ghidorah vs. Mozilla
Flops At Box Office!
Local Man Remembers Middle School As "Being Larger"
Thai Porn Restaurants Linked to Dolphin Exploitation
Obama Calls for "Courage" In Face of Pending Release of Discord Videos
More...
News & Politics
Scandal Quest: Would the Real Scandal Please Stand Up
Obama Smacks Baby, Drops Pants, and Screams Allahu Akbar!
NASA to Melt Down Armstrong Statue to Meet Payroll
Let's Combine Nationalism, Religion, and Propaganda!
Angered Christie to Fight the Next Sandy with Sand!
“Why is the President afraid to use the word terrorist?” --Dennis Miller
Bush Library Added to List of War Crimes
W Says Jeb is the Man for 2016
School Fieldtrip Visits Last Moderate Republican
A Victory for Gun Owners or for Gun Sellers?
More...
Science & Technology
Massive Ice Deposits Found in Man’s Freezer
As An Avid Shark Week Watcher...
New Technology Lets Blind See Porn
Has Anyone Seen My Contact Lens?
Voted Best Product 2012: Tens of Thousands of Zombie Feeders Recalled
Putin Downplaying Lake Vostok Zombie Outbreak
WHO: A New Wave of Superbugs Pose Dire Threat
WARNING: Cialis May Cause Public Bathing in Seperate Bathtubs
Cause of Massive Solar Flare Linked to Petraeus, Benghazi, and Obama
More...
Spirituality & Enlightenment
I Don't Always Invent Obama Scandals
God Targeting the Tea Party with Hail and Shit
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Space For Sale
My Life in Retail: Part One
Alex Bone’s Get Poor Quick Scheme
The Cycle of Wife
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
More...
Sports
Beasts & Men with Tits: Unsung Heroes of the NFL
Oprah Admits to Using Ratings Enhancing Drugs
The Annual Pine Forest Pick-Up Games Commence
New London Connecticut Mistakenly Prepares for Olympics
Kings Draft New Assistant Coach
Knowing No Hockey Customs, L.A. Kings Just Stare at Stanley Cup Until Fans Leave
Garbage Basketball a Lost Art for One Man
Go Coyotes! No, Really...You Can Move to Seattle
Uh Oh, Tebow's Getting Weird
Winnipeg Wilderness Wipes out Warm Weather Wussies
More...
Weird & Haunted Travel
HIKE: A Four Letter Word for a Reason
Bart Simpson Claims responsibility for "Nightmare Cruise"
The Haunted Palace at Prescott’s Whiskey Row
Plight of the Phoenix: How I Stopped Worrying About On-Coming Traffic and Learned to Love the Valley
Interview by a Vampire
Durango and the Haunted Hotel Hatrick
Haunted Silverton: A Grand Imperial Poltergeist
Ouray’s Western Hotel: A Very Brady Slaughter House
Haunted Colorado or Rocky Mountain High-Ya-Yay
First Real Zombie Attack in Flagstaff
More...
Contributors
Mick Zano
Scandal Quest: Would the Real Scandal Please Stand Up
Mother Road Brewing and Deschutes Unite!
A Victory for Gun Owners or for Gun Sellers?
Conservative Legacies: Just Say No
The "Media Research" Center
The Republican Scandal Identifier Kit
The Darker Corner of The TwiRight Zone
Through Rove-Colored Glasses: The GOP Fail (Part Two)
Through Rove-Colored Glasses: The GOP Fail (Part 1)
Information: Why We No Longer Get Any
More...
The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
Ask The Ghetto Shaman
More...
Tony Ballz
The Worst Song Ever Written
Brah!!
Beer And Bloating In Camp Verde
Zombienomics or Night of the Living Prez
It's The Water!
Beyond Irony or Rickrolling in A Pink Unicorn T-shirt
A-Crock-O-Shit Now
Opinions on Politics by a Non-Voter
Records Are Great
NERDS!!!!!
More...
Pierce Winslow
Space For Sale
GOP Reveals Vision For Upcoming Budget Negotiations
GOP Furious with Obama's Permanent Changes to the Capitol Building
Aliens Determined to Gangnam Style!
Another 2012 Apocalypse Theory
We Should Win A Pulitzer for This!
Twitanic
A Kidnapped Hitchhikers' Guide to the Electoral Multiverse
Sandy vs Marilyn
More...
The Crank
My Life in Retail: Part One
New York Guido Meets Arizona Gun Show
Beasts & Men with Tits: Unsung Heroes of the NFL
The GOP: Snatching Defeat from the Jaws of Victory
Cranky Predictions for 2013
Catitude: The Cat's Domestication of Mankind
Plight of the Phoenix: How I Stopped Worrying About On-Coming Traffic and Learned to Love the Valley
You Bastards! You Blew It All to Hell!
Dear Fox News
First Lady Declares Obesity "The Greatest Threat to National Defense"
More...
Alex Bone
Alex Bone’s Get Poor Quick Scheme
Thai Porn Restaurants Linked to Dolphin Exploitation
Amazon Buys Out All Major Grocery Store Chains
Men Officially Concede Battle of the Sexes
Gun Enthusiasts Use Zombie Threat to Justify Arsenals
Alien Invaders Distressed Over Failed Apocalypse
Discord Resorts to Black Magic to Increase Ratings
Interview by a Vampire
Romney Pledges to Increase Taxes for Nation’s Homeless
Romney Courts the Undead Vote
More...
Bald Tony
HIKE: A Four Letter Word for a Reason
Chinatown Vegas: You Go Now!
Vegas San Gennaro: Leave the Feast, Take the Cannoli
Another One Bites the Dust
And now for Something Completely Celtic
The First Rule of Pizza Club is
Don’t Talk About Pizza Club
Flagstaff’s Big Red Poor
The Heart Attack Grill Charged with Assisted Suicide: No Charge, Cash Only
Porn Free: One Cabby’s Vegas Tail
The Danger and Intrigue of Live Girl Billboards: Turning Road Rage into Road Raging Hard Ons
More...
Erisa Brahe
New Technology Lets Blind See Porn
Pope Seeks Retirement Advice from Emperor Palpatine
Dino Farts the Cause of Prehistoric Global Warming?
Cannibals Offended by the Name Zombie
Russian Prehistoric Lake Drilling Unleashes Zombie Plague!
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