Tag Archive for funny

Kwik-E Mart Owner Notices Muslim Bias Up, Squishee Sales Down

apufauxMLSpringfield, ??—Kwik-E Mart owner, Apu Nahasapeemapetilo, has experienced an increase in Muslim bias in recent weeks. The business owner points directly to several sermons by one Reverend Timothy Lovejoy of The First Church of Springfield. The store owner claims the Reverend is intentionally inciting violence against Muslims through controversial Sunday scripture quotes, such as: ‘Blessed are the camel humping, towelheads’ and ‘In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. And then for some reason he filled the shittier parts with sand, oil and Arabs’.

Why is The Donald Trump-Towering Over All His Opponents?

untitledIf you know so much, Mr. Zano, then why is Trump remaining so popular? It seems all of your little cartoons haven’t made a dent in old Orange Helmet. I have not been a fan of Trump. In fact, I have not spoken a word in support of his run for the Presidency. I see Trump as simply a more efficient version of President Barack Obama and, if our president were any more efficient, he’d be a dictator. Amen, for those ‘liberal’ portions of incompetence and inefficiency.

Why Are Republicans So Angry? Ignorance Is Supposed To Be Bliss

dunceGOPMLEarly in the 21st century, Republicans decided to untether themselves from reality, or more accurately, someone decide for them. Fox = news and morality = pews so no critical thinking necessary. How do they continue to gain seats with this record? Amidst the Age of Information, how have they dragged such a large faction of our country into delusion? Bill Maher recently asked, “did this crazy base always exist or have their numbers swelled through Fixed News and the like?” I think it’s a little of both. We all know someone who still says: had we only used bigger bombs in ‘Nam, or if we’d only kept those “gains” from The Surge in Iraq, or if we’d only ignored Watergate and left Nixon alone …so he could focus on Benghazi.

Herr Trump: The Democratic Anti-Candidate

HerrTrumpPhiladelphia, PAWhen I post stuff I usually just make fun of stupid people, like Zano. But here’s a unique opportunity to get all political and make fun of stupid people in one post. In case you‘ve been living on Mars, Donald Trump is leading the GOP polls by a near-record margin. The man is obviously pandering. I’m talking about Trump, not Zano…this time. He will say anything and everything just to appeal to “real Americans”. What kills me is that so many people actually believe him. Notice how he always speaks in generalities? “Oh, you don’t want to know what I would do to the terrorists.” Really? I think I do. That’s why I asked the question. Come on Don, what are ya gonna do? Are you going to shift to the middle?