Dumb Texts

This page is dedicated to the non stop dumb ass texts that are exchanged regularly between Discord Staff. Each week we pick our favorite to share with our four fans.

Put The Fish Bladder Back Guinness Or I’m Cancelling Happy Hour At Murphy’s!

Posted: November 21, 2015

Las Vegas, NV—It’s been awhile since I’ve paid homage to the Guinness Gods, but I wish I was returning to this topic under better circumstances. I bring terrible news. It’s not about the Mets; it’s much worse. Guinness is taking the trace amounts of fish bladder from their famous malt-roasted magic. I know, I know,…

Made in the Shade Brew Fest: Bring Sunscreen

Posted: June 30, 2011

Flagstaff, AZ—Brew Fests…what are they? Why would someone attend these things? What are the inherent dangers? They don’t want you to know any of this, but I think the information in this post is crucial. Here are ten simple rules that can save your life at such an event. So let’s go do the hop.

Mango Chipotle-gate? Bernie’s Beer Choice Brings Into Question His Entire Position Picking Prowess

Posted: January 12, 2016

Screw Benghazi, this is the real scandal of our age. I haven’t written much about the Bernie Sanders’ phenomenon on this blog, but his imbibing a brew from one of my main hangouts demands a response. Historic Brewing, Bernie?! You’re on my turf now. There are reasons I would love to endorse the Bernster, but I…