Happy Constitution Day!

Rick Right Pernick

How many people are aware that September 17th, was National Constitution day? My guess is “seven”.  Two-hundred twenty-two years ago on Sept 17, 1787, thirty-nine men signed the U.S. Constitution, one of them reportedly sober (the sober one was not John, “I’m going to sign this sucker so big!” Hancock).   This document built the foundation of the greatest nation in our world’s history (besides China).  Not a democracy, but a representative republic like none other before, where individuals through their chosen representatives govern themselves.

The concept and the framework of the Constitution was nothing short of brilliant, limiting the federal government’s powers and insuring the states and individuals their freedoms and liberties to pursue happiness, property, and prostitutes, by using their own labors and God-given talents, to reach what others in their homeland only dreamed about, aka, a cute red-head with big floppy breasts.

The founders sacrificed their families, wealth, virginity, and in many cases their lives fighting for what they knew could be the greatest nation ever imagined. In the end, their efforts to create a truly free society came to fruition, and their dreams were realized (bouncy, bouncy).

It’s unfortunate so many have allowed the desecration of our founding documents and so many beautiful women.  Over the last hundred years, starting with the progressives (liberals) in the republican party, to the new progressives (liberals) in the democratic party, the Constitution, Declaration of Independence, and the Bill of Rights, have become nothing more than outdated pieces of parchment that on rare occasion become a nuisance that libs occasionally trip over on their road to socialism (not to mention they make great scrap paper for Daily Discord rough drafts).

Schools today are merely a tool to indoctrinate our youth into socialism.  Teachers see the founding documents as obstacles in the pursuit of government control over our lives.  They neglect to introduce or teach the students about these documents.  Although every seventh grader knows exactly how to properly insert a penis into a studded, glow in the dark condom.  I miss school.

I ask my readers to take a little time to visit the National Archives on the web, or you can access the U.S. Constitution, the Declaration of Independence, the Bill of Rights and other Amendments to the constitution by breaking into some of those big, important looking buildings in downtown DC.

Did you notice the Eye of Mordor atop the Washington Monument in the left column of this very website? That’s not a metaphor. OK, maybe it is, but the fact remains we are losing the very structure that has sustained this country for over two hundred years.  The sounds you are hearing are our forefathers, as the Crank puts it, whirling feverishly in their mausoleums.  So why not do what the public schools will not; educate your children on the history and founding of this nation. If people today fail to understand what was sacrificed for freedom, they can never really understand what freedom is.  Now, if you will excuse me, I’m only renting this room by the hour.

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