The Trump Doctrine: Tweet Oftly And Carry A Big Button

Only one year into this cocky horror picture show and our Republican friends are already circling the old wagons. Much uncertainty clouds the onset of year two of the Greatest Administration on Earth, so it’s time for some more prognostic magic. As for the Russia-probe, the surprising effectiveness of the Hannity-led attacks on the FBI and Mueller’s team is muddying the waters. No matter how wrong Republicans get, doubling down with mindless distractions seems to serve them well. The difference with this round? The rule of law itself hangs in the balance. We are now faced with two terrible choices: Jeff Sessions remains the Attorney General and further militarizes the police, re-ignites the failed war on drugs, tramples state-laws, destroys a ton of new businesses, all while stuffing our prisons to the brim with more non-violent offenders, or choice two: Sessions is sent packing in the next couple of weeks or months in favor of a new AG who, before taking the job, agrees to reign-in the Mueller investigation. For this scenario there is clearly the potential for a more successful Saturday Night Massacre, one that allows an indictable ass-clown to remain in office. Archibald Cox sucker? But fear not, I know how this all ends! (Hint: think Rogue One meets Bambi’s mother over at The Green Mile.)

Even if Trump fires Sessions and is successful at pausing the investigation, Dems will likely take back either the house or the senate in the midterms, so shit will likely resume with a new vigor. At the end of Trump’s day, we’re looking at Robert Mueller and James Comey v Trump and frauds. This is not a contest, and no matter what happens these more sensible voices will not be so easily silenced. My respect for Hillary Clinton grew during the Benghazi hearings. She didn’t break a sweat for umpteen hours on the hot seat. Let’s compare that to a fool who can’t make it through a sentence, let alone a hearing. Our current president is a man who can’t listen to an entire intelligence briefing unless it contains tailored and periodic praises and avoids “touchy” subjects. Oh, and they must all be fitted to match the length of the average commercial during an episode of Access Hollywood.

There will likely be enough evidence in all three key areas of the Russia-probe to do some serious damage to a number of Trump’s inner minions. The Russians did interfere with our election and are continuing to do so. Although Trump is not directly culpable in this, continuing to ignore this interference is actually an impeachable offense in its own right. As for the areas that will leave a mark: obstruction of justice is already all but proven, before the details of the investigation even emerge. Money laundering through Moscow will also be discovered. Remember, Trump is a schiester in all things (see: Trump’s entire life). Collusion is the only real question mark, but only because it’s difficult to prove and, for Trump, difficult to spell. Attempted collusion is already in the bag, so my guess is Mueller will go either two for three, or three for three.

Why would Republicans be surprised by this outcome? Your president wasn’t even trustworthy enough to open a casino in Vegas. Let’s compare that with the Republican score card on Hillary scandals, which stands at a whopping .5 for 326. Hell of a batshit average, folks. League of Their Own? Bullshit Durham?

[Field of Dreamers joke removed by the editor.]

Tell you what, if anything comes of the right’s Uranium One or Dossier scandal I’ll wear a Make America Great Again hat on YouTube and chant ‘lock her up’. Deal? But if I’m right and if you voted for Bush and Drumpf, do the world a favor and skip the next 15 election cycles or so.

At some point Trump will implode and when that happens it’s important we shift focus to bringing down all the president’s enablers. From Fox News that list includes Judge Jeanine Pirro, Tucker Carlson and, of course, Sean Hannity. From the senate it’s Lyndsey Graham, Chuck Grassley, Paul Ryan, Mitch McConnell and everyone sitting on the Republican side of the senate intelligence committee. And let’s not forget Vice President Mike Pence. Everyone in those wagons currently circling this dangerously incompetent man-child must be held accountable. These people are all criminally negligent and whether it’s protests, or pulling sponsors, or sitting on their fucking lawns with signs, a coordinated effort to bring these bozos to justice must occur. I’m not saying it’s going to happen, but it should. And I will be leading the charge! Charge of the Zano’s right brigade?

As for some other predictions, the Iran deal is toast and breaking this contract will end any future attempts by competent U.S. leadership. So the march toward Iran nukes and the subsequent war can resume unimpeded. Oh, and this one could trigger WWIII. Thanks? North Korea is really anyone’s guess, because a war shouldn’t happen, but now just might. If millions of people do die in the next wholly avoidable ‘big button’ bravado-fest, please take some responsibility peeps. You decided to pit dumb and crazy against smart and crazy. Good luck with that.

General Kelly, Mattis, and McMaster represent our last hope. They need to clearly voice their concerns about this president’s ailing mental health and his glaring inability to lead this country. Every day they delay brings us one step closer to disaster. Trump is in so far over his head that, even with the aid of Miracle Grow, Rogaine and some magic beans, his combover still won’t reach Obama’s shoes.

If our generals are going to save the day, it’s likely to occur during the lead up to the next war, aka soon. My money is on General Kelly. General, if you’re listening, history is going to damn anyone who stood by this president. Put country first and expose Trump for the fraud he is. I remember urging Colin Powell to step down rather than pitch Bush’s bullshit war to the UN. If you asked him today, he would admit that that was his darkest hour. Here we go again, folks. Will the top brass heed my warning this time? Will anyone see the tweeting on Trump’s wall? #Impeach #Indict #Don’tLetTheDoorHitYou


“Discord on one level is harmony on another.”
― Alan W. Watts



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