Dear Ghetto Shaman,

Things have changed as my husband has gotten older. I still want to have sex all the time but he’s satisfied with once or twice a week, at most. I’ve tried everything to peak his interest: midgets, swings, toys, swing toys, and manipulating toys in a swing with midgets. Nothing has worked! Shouldn’t my significant other do his husbandly duty? Isn’t he obligated to satisfy my every fantasy and whim? 24/7? Midgets sold separately.

Sixty Nine Sally (that’s not my age or my real name)

Dear 69S,

Yes.

The Ghetto Shaman

P.S. I sent you my actual cell phone number in the reply email. Oh, and I always BYOM (Bring my Own Midget)